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a anonymous commenter on the previous post pointed out that it’s reasonable that the au pair found Elsa overwhelming and i should probably lighten up.

if that was truly the only reason for her departure, i would not fault her for that.  but i truly think it was not, so i am a bit cranky about the whole thing.

the au pair made the decision to go home because she was homesick and lonely – something that happens a lot to au pairs after they’ve been here a month or two, before they have gotten settled and made friends.  she later said she decided she doesn’t really want to care for children, or live with them.  she refused all other re-placement offers from the au pair agency, even to easy placements, like families with one older child.   she just wanted to go home.  i think she wanted a fun adventure in the US, and the childcare part was not for her.  which is fine – we’re better off without her, in that case.

(also, for the record, i would never expect a child-care provider to deal with Elsa when her behavior spirals out of control.  i am the person to deal with it when it happens…  so, far, Elsa’s saved those behaviors for me.)

so, i don’t like her pointing to Elsa as the sole reason for her departure when in reality it was that au pair gig was just not for her.   Elsa has enough labeling and judgement from the world – she doesn’t need more.   and we are dealing with a 5-week gap in childcare because of her hasty departure, which is a total nightmare.    so i’m not in the mood to be touchy-feely and supportive of her now that she is feeling regret over her decision.

and that’s the end of my rant about the old au pair.

the new one is showing up Sept 10, and i’m hoping he’ll be great (yes, you read that right – it’s a manny!).  we were excruciatingly clear with him about what he’d be signing up for, and he’s interested in working with special needs kids (and has experience) and incredibly enthusiastic, so i’m optimistic.

I scored myself and my extended family a house at the beach for the week.

In my head, this meant that we’d all be hanging out relaxing and staring at a fire in between dips in the hot tub and chilly walks on the beach.  And, given all the other adults in the house, Elsa would be blissfully entertained by others, freeing me to dabble in the kitchen and whip up scrumptious food for everyone.

In reality, my work schedule is a nightmare and I’m in the office all day and doing conference calls to France in the early morning hours.

This makes me cranky.

We were lucky enough to have scored an invitation to my friend Q’s fabulous Tgiving dinner, so I don’t have to crank that out (amen), but I have planned just about every other meal this week and bought enough food to last through a nuclear winter.  Would be sad if we all end up eating hot dogs because I don’t have time to cook.

I should be feeling so very thankful right now – this year has been extraordinary in so many ways, and I am so blessed.

But instead I am a festival of bitchiness.  Pity my family, friends, child and (especially) my girlfriend.

Bitch at the beach… maybe I’m just beachy.

Had such a great time with the fabulous Q at last night’s awesome cooking class!

Here is one of the recipes, as requested by my friend Megan.

White Cheddar and Chive Shortbread Coins

Dough can be made ahead and held for 3 days in refrigerator or indefinitely in the freezer.

Yield: about 36 cookies

1 stick (4 ounces) cold unsalted butter, cut into ½ inch pieces

1 cup (4 ounces) all-purpose flour

8 ounces white cheddar (or gruyère) cheese, finely grated

½ teaspoon kosher salt

¼ teaspoon freshly-ground black pepper

2 teaspoon chopped fresh chives

Sea salt, for garnish

In the bowl of the food processor fitted with a metal blade, place all ingredients (except chives and sea salt) and process for about 45 seconds. Scrape down the bowl and break up any large clumps with a silicone spatula.  Process for another 15 to 30 seconds, until the dough forms large, shaggy clumps. Dump the dough out onto a work surface, add chives and knead gently several times, just to bring it together.

Squeeze the dough into a log about 12 inches long and about 1 inch in diameter and gently roll it back and forth until smooth.  Don’t add flour if the dough is sticky – simply refrigerate the dough for 15 to 20 minutes to firm up the butter, then try again.  Wrap the rolls in plastic wrap and twist the ends to close.  Refrigerate for 1 hour.

Preheat oven to 300 degrees and position an oven rack in the center.  Line two sheets with parchment paper.

Remove the plastic wrap from the dough log and use a thin slicing knife to cut it into 3/8-inch-thick rounds.  Place about 18 rounds 1 inch apart on each prepared baking sheet.  Sprinkle each round with a few grains of sea salt.  Bake, rotating the pans halfway through the baking time, for 30 minutes, or until the shortbreads are cooked through and look dry on top.  Transfer to a cooling rack and let dry completely.

OK, so I already posted about the first Sur La Table cooking class I’m going to.

The second one is in a couple of weeks – Saturday December 4th to be exact.   10:30 A.M.  In scenic Santa Rosa (about an hour north of San Francisco).

It’s called Gifts from the Kitchen, and includes the following recipes…

  • Panforte
  • Smoked Salt, Dried Apricot and Almond Chocolate Bark
  • Orange Cardamom Marmalade
  • Double Fudge Brownie Pops
  • Chipotle Chile Candied Nuts

My friend Jennie was supposed to go with me – she already bought her ticket and now can’t use it. This is tragic for her, but presents an opportunity for you.

Anyone want to go in her stead?

Join me please!!

I love to cook.  I haven’t really done much of it since becoming a mom… can’t seem to figure out how to work in the kitchen whilst (1) holding down a full-time job and (2) minding a rather active child with a short attention span.

Lately, though, there have been times when K has watched Elsa (and her own two kiddos) for a while so I can spend some quality time in the kitchen…  it’s been sporadic at best, but really nice.

The other day when I wished aloud that I could take a couple of cooking classes, K practically insisted that I sign up.  And so I clicked through on one of my kitchen porn emails from one of my favorite temptations, Sur La Table, and found a couple of fabulous-sounding classes to take.

This Friday is “Holiday Hors d’Oeuvres“, which includes the following deliciousness:

  • White Cheddar and Chive Shortbread Coins
  • Proscuitto-Wrapped Scallops
  • Crostini with Cranberry-Apple Chutney, Caramelized Shallots and Herbed Goat Cheese
  • Thai Beef Skewers with Lemongrass-Mint Dipping Sauce
  • Chocolate Chunk-Pecan Bread Pudding Bites with Golden Caramel Sauce

Since I am relieved of dinner duty for Thanksgiving (thank God and my friend Q who will be providing dinner for me and my whole fam damily), I am chock full of plans to spend my time off that week whipping up all of these things instead.

See these hangers?  Every single one represents an item of clothing that was yanked from my closet and put in a big ol’ bag (OK, several bags) to be donated.  And when I say yanked, I mean it – the hangers were jammed so tightly together it was difficult to get anything in or out.

And this? This is the closet that WAS bursting.  I literally could not fit one more thing in it.  And I had no idea what items where on which shelves.  It was total chaos and made me stressed just to see it.

Lest you think the dresser was not immune – everything came out, and only a fraction went back in.  my drawers look like this now.

Ahhhh.

I credit my sister Kate - who is moving from a big house with loads of stuff to a tiny adorable house (NEAR ME!) and is shedding her crap like crazy.  She inspired me.

And special thanks to the fabulous Suzanne, who came by to help me sort, fold, hang, bag, etc. – could not have done it without her.  Thanks, Shazam!!

I like my iPad. But not as much as Elsa does. Especially now that I’ve downloaded about a frillion episodes of Dora the Explorer.

I try not to abuse this solution, but am starting to understand why people stick their kids in front of the TV every day. It’s kind of a miracle – 24 straight minutes of relative quiet, during which Elsa remains practically motionless in one place.

the very definition of rapt

as you might imagine, i don’t do much in the way of home improvement nowadays.  or even basic home maintenance.  whatever.  i don’t have the time or the energy (or the budget, because i’d rather go to Maui and eat out, apparently).

but my mom kept complaining that the front walkway and steps to my house are too dark for her, and since i don’t want her breaking a hip on me, i managed after about 6 months, eventually, to go to the store and buy some really groovy little solar path lights.

i lined them up, 5 on each side, and they did a lovely job lighting the path and the stairs (i put the top two in potted plants on the top of the stairs – very clever, if i do say so myself).

this morning i walked out to find some a-hole had stolen half of them.

what kind of person walks into someone’s yard in the night and just yanks cute little solar lights out of the ground?

some kind of truant who is also really into landscaping?

WTF?

On Mondays, I sometimes get to work at home.  And when I do, it is PRICELESS.

Besides laundry, dishes, and other various housekeeping things I can get done, I have HOURS of silence, in my own home.  Something that almost never happens.  And I can get so much actual work done!

I’m telling you, when I’ve had it up to HERE with my job, I remind myself that I occasionally get Mondays at home, and it makes me want to stay.

On most at-home Mondays I take India for a walk at lunch time, then come back and scour the fridge for lunch items that I’m too lazy to bring to work.  Today I am having leftover coffee-crusted steak over a broccolini and mushroom saute.  None of it made be me – but who cares?  Doggie bags are the best.

yummers (and look! no carbs!)

today I was a jock, then attempted to channel Martha Stewart, and ended by doing my special-needs social butterfly thing.

i got up early and went to the boathouse to row. the rain stopped for a while and we actually got most of our workout done in a window of beautiful weather. and then the sky opened up and drenched us on the way back to the dock. (still went to Peet’s to get my soy latte fix on the way home…. stood in line cold, shivering, dripping…). it was worth it.

mid morning, I bundled up the kiddo in the crazy weather and headed over to Q’s house for a marathon baking session. in response to my earlier post about tipping/holiday gifts, she offered to bake with me so we’d both have lots of Christmas cookies to give away. she also has a huge fabulous kitchen and (thank God) an unreasonable affection for Elsa, who spent about 5 hours zooming around Q’s house while we baked our asses off. (we actually tried getting her to nap once or twice, which did not work. at all.) we made about a frillion cookies, but i burned maybe 25% of them, so that wasn’t so great. in the end, Q sent me home with me more than half of them, then continued to bake for herself. she is a goddess among women.

then, in the evening evening, i went to a fancy-ass holiday party. got all dressed up, used makeup and everything, and even put on heels (making me a touch over 6’4″). went to the event and stood around with a glass of wine and feeling somewhat lame (it was a fundraiser and I pretty much had no budget for the auction items) but occasionally seeing people I know and that was nice. also met a lot of folks i don’t know, which (for me) is exhausting and kind of stressful because i’m fundamentally painfully shy and social retarded.  it LOOKS like i’m having fun but i’m pretty much constantly cringing inside.

as you can imagine, i am pooped.

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